Afraid Of

Gazing at stars, he took birth but
so afraid to let go, kept his eyes shut
far far away from the noise of this new-built city
he was asleep in the shade of chestnut.

The way he walked, marked a cut
rendering his life in a rut
shattering his bones
making him a brut.

His heart shakes every time, a storm passes by,
blocking it with more disgust
even air appears to be an attack,
filling his nostrils with undesirable break & dust.

Veins on the verge of explosion,
flowing rivers of tears,
spilled blood on the floor,
longest journey ahead for the peace, but
lies there a fact not known to him,
about a hidden diamond which is just yet uncut.

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Recursive Meditation: A tool to build your mind and body

Disclaimer: This post isn’t about how to meditate or about the workout routine, diet tips etc to get that chiseled look. Later about that may be. 🙂

Success is broken, goal is shattered & path to it is singular so that being said, one cannot find complete happiness at the end of it. Go somewhere else, do something else, if that’s the only motive.

You see, there is always something lacking. I think, it has to be this way if not we’d all be just… brittle. And strange thing is people adapts all sorts of techniques or processes to achieve what’s not there, and yet never reaching to the saturation point. Well, I am no exception. These things can’t be taught, can only be learnt by making mistakes and takes years, you realize here, what I’m talking about, “That tenuous sole connection between our mind and soul.”

Basically, it all started with a roar, “You’re gonna keep doing reps, till I say so.” one more, one more… and no-one really knows on what number, counter stopped. I’ve had seen such incidents in movies but never had it happened with me. Pump was great and I was confused. How did I actually do that? What kept me going? Why did my muscles not went nuts in previous sets but this one? The answer was simple but tough to grasp and even adapt. One gotta take control of mind & generation of thoughts; be it positive or negative. Taking control of that ongoing battle whether I should continue or drop it.  It’s like controlling your thoughts to control the mind which are controlled by mind itself, see, this is what I call meditation; a recursive one. Mediation is generally considered as a practice to train your mind to induce a mode of consciousness in which you’re supposed to sit on a place and focus on one thing. But I think it as a 24 hours practice, in which you fight with all sorts of dark energy which is invariably demanding to put you on your knees. 

So, these two things mind and body are tied to each other with a thin line called pain which comes in varities. Our whole life revolves around it from birth to death yet we keep looking for ways to dodge it; irrespective of the fact that, it is imperative. Sooner we realise this, the sooner we’ll be master of our body and mind. But this cannot happen overnight, it’s a continual struggle till one dies and you need this, believe or not, to fail, to succeed, to get that relieve that otherwise would never come. 

That’s the secret, this is the limitation, everyone seem to be searching for, mind-muscle control. Once you transcend it, no time & space exists for you anymore. You reach into the state where what you imagine, becomes reality. You create an image of end-result and becomes desperately obsessed with it that you do whatever it takes to make that a reality. And this image doesn’t have to be some really farfetched vision but could be simpler things like watching myself completing this post in next hour or watching myself going for those 20 reps, even if I ended up tearing my muscles apart. You see our mind works pretty much like water, as water takes the shape of whatever container holds it, whether it be in a glass or a vessel or a seashore. Likewise, our mind will fabricate itself according to the thoughts/images. That’s how one’s destiny is created. To change the visible part, we have to first change the invisible. People often neglect this step and work tirelessly to change the external. This might save you a breath or two, but you won’t be able to dive deep with it.

Let’s take a smooth yet influential example. Have you ever seen any athlete practicing? Why do they practice so hard, while the reality is comparatively easy? Why soldiers has to go through rigorous training? It’s to keep them ready for the sake of deterrence. This is to break them mentally so nothing, absolutely nothing comes as surprise later. Another quick example would be, individuals working out set after set hitting weights, simply “moving weights around”, without even realising that it’s all waste because targeted muscle isn’t fatigued yet or may be the motion has become compound movement unknowingly and some other muscle group is being worked upon now. So, secret is, to establish a direct connection between the brain and muscle seeking to be targeted, then only full contraction can happen, then only it gets developed. Right (?), we believe in stones blindly, then how hard it is to believe in the only one thing that’s truly ours. As they say “Practice doesn’t make you perfect, perfect practice makes you perfect.”

Lots on mind, pen down for now…

Malnourished flame of love

Since thousands of years, I am headed to that flame
heard she’s glowing somewhere far far away
heard she’s a desire not the part of fire
shaky yet definite, tender yet mature, thin yet efficient.

Heard she’s mad when wind rustle through the trees
obliging for a conversion into fire
asking to hold her to put an end to this restlessness
reading an anecdote to close her eyes.

Heard she’s sad when they don’t adore her warmth
tests your patience to see if it flee
giggles with you till tear roll down your eye
stares with those biggest brown eyes till you are lost.

Heard she’s the reason for so many to live
yet the reason to give all and die
yet the reason for understanding love
yet the reason for believing in angel from up above.

Heard she’s yellowish-orange like sun
but fair enough to take your breathe away
heard she’s hot like lava
but soft enough to slip out of hands
Heard she’s the one, the dream, the star, the heart, the truth,
the fun, the therapist,
but never realised she’s the feeling of contentment and
the young love.

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I was just wondering what I should write about? Lots of crash is in mind revolving like hell from this corner to that. And the whole thing just stuck at one point Attitude , lots of people around me have serious attitude problem. They show it because they want to, without even giving a thought that what if I start. Don’t you think,”Where was my that attitude when I was asking for help ? From where was that gentle talks bursting from my mouth at that very time when the one was helping?Isn’t it the same person who was so nice before & still being nice to me? And later should you not thinking what would have happened if that person have shown the same attitude towards me too?Am I so conscious about being so smart or I am a real idiot with nothing on ground?”
Some people do things without even thinking what would be the consequences if they do this? Let’s take an example of being in so attitude or loosing sense of control…
You get up so late to go to your work. Kinda in hurry, & at once your kid just split some milk over the table mistakenly … Now there could be two paths that may design your whole day …

1)You scold your child for what he did & get some more delay to go & make everyone mood off & left the house & your kid even missed the school bus due to you so mother has to go till school with him & While driving you checked your pocket & what ? forget even purse & mobile … Now you have to go back & get some more time in your delay counter & after honorable delay you reaches offices & there now your Boss welcomes you with quite hard to crack speech & questions & then drives your senses more crazy & makes you more frustrated & then this frustration can be seen in your work too & everything goes wrong & then whole day becomes no more than just unhappy seconds which you have pass even if you don’t want .

Now see it’s counter part

2)You didn’t scold your child just tell him nicely to be careful & then child go to school on time via bus & even if you forget your purse & mobile, your wife could have reminded you & deliver those things to you & then you reach office on time & do your work properly .

So wasn’t that happy ending ? What would you prefer … being so obnoxious or being so smart ?

I experience these things almost every day [but let me tell you,I face being smart one & yes I feel really great after some time passes that I didn’t do anything stupid at that time ;)]Let me tell ya I too have attitude i.e. much much greater than yours. So don’t ya dare cross limits .

Buddy I know attitude matters most, it counts to 100 but don’t let it take control over you else you just think that you can think champ .

I am writing here what am I feeling  just, it got nothing to insult anyone or anything, if you felt so I apologize .